You hate tree jokes, Aku? I wonder what that stems from. Let’s branch out and get to the root of the issue.

“HOW ABOUT KNOT.”

“…THAT WAS NOT A PUN! PUN KNOT INTENDED!!”

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Six months in the pit for simply ‘oaking’ around with you? That is an unbe’leaf’ably harsh punishment, Aku…

“If you do not stop this and leaf me alone, I will—” Wait. Dammit!

“BRAAAAAAAAARRGHH!!”

Pssst! Hey Aku, remember when you threw Jack’s sword to the sun? Well, you might want to do an update cheek on it now because guess who retrieve it recently.

“WHAT? IMPOSSIBLE!”

“May I ask as in… why you’re so strongly worshiped by people like an Ultimate God? Your son couldn’t give me answers, and I’m genuinely curious.” -curioosity

“Because I am the Supreme Ruler of this Earth and my Evil is Law. All those who seek refuge in my world will be granted residence in exchange for their worship and undying obedience to Aku.

And for the last time, I HAVE NO SON!”

Name a list of your friends and enemies.

“Well, let’s see…

Enemies:

The Samurai
his weak and insignificant friends
~~the Gods~~

Friends:

My minions
my scientists
my loyal followers
my… therapist?

Look at how many friends I have!”

Fact: he has no actual friends.

you should devour the other akus to attain even more power!

In case if you’re been wondering to why Scaramouche always loss communication with you is because he gets interrupted in a middle of a fight with someone while all this time he’s been trying to tell you about Jack’s missing sword. So, maybe you might want to call him back to let him know that you’re aware of the sword’s absence.

“I have tried calling him back but for some reason he keeps not answering his phone. I HAVE LEFT HIM 20 MESSAGES.”

Lord Aku, did you ever try winning the respect of the world’s children by telling stories again, or was it just the one time?

“Yes, I have tried again since then. I once wrote a children’s book about a little wizard boy with GREAT FLAMING EYEBROWS who was chosen to save the world from a terrible snake-faced samurai warrior.

But sales were poor and the books never left the shelves. Worst of all, it was free.”

Commence aggressive pouting. Winning admiration’s hard.

How’s your relationship with Scaramouche been going lately?

“I have not heard from him in quite some time. Since he seems to have dropped out of communication, he has subsequently dropped out of my list of favorites.”

((I’m the anon that asked Aku about Demongo yesterday. Man, I was just watching the “Jack vs Demongo” episode and afterwards I send you that ask and then later tonight during the new episode, guess who’s back?! LOL! Such a huge coincidence that I was looking back at Demongo yesterday and then he suddenly makes a cameo outta of nowhere. I never saw that one coming.))

Was it just me or was his voice mercifully lower this time? It didn’t sound like he was reaching that near-ultrasonic pitch.